Today, I Saved a Seat For My Anxiety

I can’t fight her anymore.

Photo by Armen Aydinyan on Unsplash

She is neither soft nor gentle.

She enters in the most abrupt of ways.

She is never invited,

And yet she always stays.

Long after plates are cleared

And the guests have made their way,

She flops down on my favourite couch

And the world, it slowly grays.

Usually, I scold her.

I beg her to please leave.

I plead with every breath I have,

I get down on my knees.

I drag her by the ankles

Though I know she won’t relent,

On this one, singular matter

I’m entirely hellbent.

I refuse for her to be here

lest she take me where I won’t return.

The longer that I’m near her

The stronger the past burns.

But just today, oh, just for once,

I saved her a space.

We cuddled on the sofa,

We watched Frankie & Grace.

I know she’s scared and lonely

And has no place to go,

So just until the day breaks,

I’ll let her call me home.